The Hunt by Jordyn White

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          After reading The Lord of the Flies, I've been reflecting on the hunting aspect of the book a lot.  And with that, I was thinking about how the experience would be different--more domesticated.  I revisioned this as a family hunting trip between father and daughter.  So without further ado, I present The Hunt:

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The Hunt
Large flakes drift toward the ground and join with the other fallen soldiers covering the greenery.  Virtually untouched, a chalky blanket of fresh powder lines the hillsides.  Nothing but two sets of footprints and one of a hoofed mammal penetrate the frozen sheet, heading toward a forest of barren trees.  Snow clings to every crevice of the shrubbery, in stark contrast to the crimson blood trail.
Further in the trees a bundled-up man with a salt-and-pepper beard carries a rifle, waits dutifully for his diminutive companion to catch up.  The two finally rejoin, and it’s clear that the man is accompanied by a child clad in a camouflage jacket and snow pants.  The two march forward holding hands and follow the blood trail deep into the woods.
As the blood drops become closer together, the pair slows their pace and time appears to stand still.  The crackling of the branches under the weight of the snow and the steady patter of the descending flakes are almost forgotten--the only sound they can hear is the steady thum-thum of blood rushing to their ears.  Adrenaline courses through their veins; this is it: the prize of a lifetime.
Finally, they reach it, a six-point buck.  Although the shaft of the arrow has long disappeared, the arrowhead is stuck firmly in its broadside.  The eyes are glassy and its body lays still, the faintest trace of blood dripping down its front leg and onto the crystalline ice below.  The man and the child look at the buck in amazement.  The child’s hood falls back to reveal locks of golden curls beneath.  Father and daughter share a quaint smile and hug, grateful for the meal stretched at their feet.  
Two pairs of footprints double back towards a dimly lit home, faintly visible in the oncoming flurry.


A father and daughter hunting, not unlike the pair in my story.  Via CityScope Magazine 


Comments

  1. AnonymousMay 13, 2020 at 7:39 AM

    I absolutely LOVE the descriptions in this story, they are beautiful and creative and paint the scene out perfectly. I especially love how you described the snow with the lines, "Large flakes drift toward the ground and join with the other fallen soldiers covering the greenery. Virtually untouched, a chalky blanket of fresh powder lines the hillsides." Describing the snowflakes as "fallen soldiers" is ingenious.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousMay 18, 2020 at 5:37 AM

    This short story is so wonderfully descriptive. The entire scene can easily be pictured within my mind. This was incredibly well written! I love the metaphors and other descriptive language used throughout the piece. Great job!

    ReplyDelete
  3. DanielleMay 18, 2020 at 2:30 PM

    Excellent work and I love that you took a different path with the blog post.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousMay 28, 2020 at 9:06 AM

    Nice one Jay. Your a really good writer. Make this into a book please.

    ReplyDelete

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